Lineages, Gratitude and Prayers

Margaret's wedding gown/zen matriarchal lineage
Margaret’s wedding gown/zen matriarchal lineage

My maternal grandmother’s wedding gown. I used to play dress up in it when I was
a little girl. One of the few things I still have of my mothers after she died 9 years ago.
I have a small green tin that she saved recipes in. On 3×6 cards. Some of them have her
own cursive handwriting. It feels alive. I have a calendar she must have bought when she and Dad went to Ireland for their 25th wedding anniversary. I still can’t believe they traveled to another country, not once but twice! First Ireland and then Switzerland. I remember Dad saying, “Ireland was great but they serve their beer warm. I couldn’t find a cold beer anywhere!” And when they came back from Switzerland, well the food was horrible. But, what about the chocolate?!? Nope. There’s no place like home.

They were right of course. I read somewhere, one of those lovely quotes that makes you stop and think, something about, “live the kind of life that you don’t  have to go on vacation. Your life is where you want to be.” Now, that’s not to say I don’t want to travel- Nova Scotia, Ireland/Scotland/Wales. Oh, maybe Turkey and other eastern European countries. Maybe even India for a second time. The main difference is, if I don’t, that will be ok too. Being content/settled.
Filled with wonder every single day. There’s so much to see.
Become aware of. See again, each time, as if for the first.

I’ve been given so much in this lifetime.
Gifts. Breathing in.
Breathing out.
Birthing beautiful sons.

More grace. I used to think/feel.
Often. That this bigness of life. This fullness was almost unbearable.
Now I feel it’s my responsibility to honor that fullness.
Without boundaries.
Fullness unending.
Not big or small or bearable or un.
Completely and utterly accepting.
Now is a thank you
Now is the prayer.
Like the ocean waves rolling in.
swoosh/thank you
whoosh/thank you

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