A busy month for sure. Here we are in the last week of the first month of a new year. Fairly jam-packed so, I think listing is the most concise and accurate.
Writing class: sit/walk/write with Natalie Goldberg and my dear friend Annie.
And an infrequent unfight – with my partner. I thought I was perfect. What could I, how could I possibly have made you___________. Filling in the blank is what I do. But now, on the other side, I see that the story has gone on well past it’s day. In other words, drop it, Mary.
There are now five planets visible in the morning sky: Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn. A miracle.
David Bowie moved up into the ethers.
I work. I. I’m working with pain in the body. I never really knew what this meant. Who wants to feel, even more, what we’re? I’m already/always trying to get away from? This pain: here, then over there and mostly, when lifting my arms, and as they come together parallel with my eyes. And then up, up, over head to take off my shirt.
I have to make the animal noise/a release in order to move the arm just so. Just so I can complete the movement and remove the shirt/bra etc. And so on. I say, “aghhhh..”
And. Lucy comes running.
Not grasping. No victim.
Who’s responsible? The jig is up.
“At some point,” he said, “we say, enough.” And then, although experientially, it may take the rest of our lives, you can’t/won’t be able to go back to sleep. You’re awake. Even though there are days, sometimes on end, where the eyes are droopy or closed tight shut, you cannot fully return to that ignorant slumber.
And I can and will go forward. Going forward.
and then he said, “when you sit down, the world sits down.” A new voice that called to me from ancient ancestry.