Softening

Deep into the 5th month of my kundalini yoga teacher training, I’m finding the question, “what needs melting”, apropos. I am a “full on” type of student/seeker/learner. After the first months of diving deeply; daily practices of movement and meditation and chanting, often beginning prior to the crack of dawn, the physical form called, “Stop!”

I can go w-a-y into the container I’ve got, blinders on/focused. SHE said “stop” and I couldn’t not listen. And in the stopping many understandings have been bubbling to the surface (there’s melting going on here). The hard perimeters of concepts that no longer serve and stop the growing process. Gentleness is required, (or else), there is more freezing. Heart melts (can I love more, can I allow myself to be loved more?) Unconscious assumptions that are unknown unless time is taken for exploration.

What is a teacher (dismantling). Can I soften my judgements enough to see through to the gems? Softening the edges that make up this “Mary”. Edges previously unknown. Even on the coldest days after inches of snowfall,
out in nature, barely able to plow one foot in front of the other,
I can hear the rippling sounds of water.
Form and the melting of; nothing linear about it. It’s all happening.
Now.